… she's not coming down 'til it all makes sense again…



Update on Zack’s room: I googled “Beige on Beige” for a pic to describe what Zack’s room looks like now…










kim beige

It does actually look like Kim and North layered in neutral Spanx…

Primered and painted first coat on Thursday, it was not as fun as I promised myself, because I second-guessed myself the whole dang day, kept stopping and staring at the walls, wasted half the day wondering if I was making a huge mistake… I usually enjoy Primering Day!!! But then yesterday morning, Friday fresh start,  I got up and knocked the second coat out in 80 minutes!! (I like to time things, so I can have a better perspective on how long it REALLY takes to do a job once you quit FARTING AROUND)

Here’s what I want to remember about painting walls:

  1. it always looks stark and boring and like a BIG MISTAKE, until you bring back all the cool stuff that belongs to the room’s INHABITANT. The inhabitant and their quirky little interests are what makes a room come to life. Why do you always forget this??? Just paint the dang walls, so you can get to the FUN part: decoratin’!!
  2. I thought about the time after Grandma and Pap passed… and Aunt Sis and her kids and Uncle George were living in the house… and Uncle George and I think Uncle Tom patched and painted the whole house BEIGE, every wall, covered it all, Grandma’s peacock teals, yellows, pinks… because that’s what they told you to do to prepare a house for sale, you make it beige, so prospective buyers can project their own lives, their own belongings, their own colors onto a blank canvas…  I was patching and repairing a room where my kids have spend nearly 20 years bouncing off the walls, like they do… I thought about my uncles, patching and repairing their years in those same walls… Remember when Grandma wanted to make the first little bedroom into an extra dining room, (because the family is ENORMOUS and KEEPS GROWING lol) so they cut a doorway through the hall closet? well, it was a good effort, but it probably never functioned as an extra dining room, because the family still gathers and sorta blobs about in this tiny living/dining area in one giant amorphous amoebic clump… Uncle George patched that doorway up seamlessly… just an excellent job… and turned it back into a hall closet and a bedroom… now inhabited by a certain little musician/adventurer/college student/chicken fryer…
  1. Painter’s tool. FINALLY got me one of these mo-fo’s.. ( maybe don’t use that term in front of kids though, they will pick it right up) How many years, how many ACRES have I painted, without owning one of these magical things:
    Coral Performance 9 in 1 Painters Multi Tool

    Product photo of the Coral Performance Multi-tool with 9 functions

    So far, I’ve only explored the straight scraper edge, that was nice for removing the wallpaper border… and that rounded half-moon edge, that was AWESOME, for the first time in my life I actually achieved CLEANING AND REUSING A PAINT ROLLER! and it didn’t take 12 hours and 2433333 gallons of water to clean it either, just scraaape the paint out of the roller!!! It was a beautiful thing, I tell ya…  Now, what is that weirdly shaped scraper edge for, along the other side? And what, pray tell, could you do with that little slotted HOLE in the center? Remove nails? And why is there a beer bottle opener on the …. that wouldn’t open paint cans would it? paint cans, beer bottles, potato, potAHto… best tool EVER. Ohmygosh, clean rollers in my future…sigh….

  1. Patching always looks good, until you paint it… I am no professional painter. They have some sort of voodoo magic patching hands. Or maybe they just do the job right. I slap on one layer of patch, sand er off with a little wadded up piece of sandpaper, primer it, and slap paint over it. I can see EVERY SINGLE REPAIR I’ve ever made. Maybe you have to do two coats of patch, sand in between, and use a sanding block instead of your hand? Probably. Maybe someday I will take pride in something and actually try to do it right.. Not today though. Today I just want that wall painted and that boy back in his room, doin his homework and dreamin his dreams…
  1. Semi gloss is not for walls. Only had to learn that lesson once. Semi gloss may be easier to scrub, but it looks like THE BOWELS OF HELL on walls. Oh, you think I hyperbolize? NO. Semi-gloss on walls looks like the gleaming glaring glowing intestines of SATAN, God’s Dark Morning Star.
  2. what the SAM HILL is going on with this numbering format..
  3. lol THREEE
  4. I don’t have a fourth thing. The walls are painted. The outlets and light switch will all be replaced, hopefully this weekend, if I can get Hubs to cooperate, holy crap, fresh clean brand new outlets, the kind where you plug something in and the plug doesn’t RANDOMLY FALL OUT of the socket, oh it’s gonna be INCREDIBLE… The base board will be replaced… you and I know this part will not happen for 17 years, for that is how long it takes to replace baseboard or window trim in our family.. sad, but true… The floor, well, the floor is rough… we’ve had a guy in to talk about refinishing… but he wants money, this guy… every guy that steps in the house with a little clipboard and a brochure wants the same thing…. I’ll think about that tomorrow…. TODAY I’m picking out a BEd-In-A-Bag that says “My Son is a Guy, a COOL Guy, A GUY’S Guy, a Man, really, Not A Boy Now, He’s Grown, He Thinks about Man Things Now”    You know what says all that? Blue Plaid. That is it and that is all. Beige Walls and Blue Plaid.